Cerveza se los Muerto: Porter

This beer is a complete and utter random buy, and unexpectedly enjoyable. It comes in a bright orange and festive six pack container with ruttin good examples of Mexican folk art, and Day of the Dead celebrations. Before I talk about the bottle or the beer itself, whoever the damn artist is for the Dia de los Muertos brewery deserves a ruttin award. The box caught the eye of this captain and my first officer, who is joining in on this review. The bottle also features soddin nice art. It’s almost worth buying the beer to just have the labels. The bottle features a cloaked reaper on a ram headed boat above the quote “Pay the Ferryman.”  This is on par with Old Rasputin’s “Never Say Die.” A good ruttin slogan for a beer is a great addition for this captain.

The beer is a dark coffee smelling brew. It pours well into any glass, or just drink it from the damn pretty bottle. It has a smokey coffee initial taste followed by beer of choie malty rich after taste that lingers in your damn mouth. It is not the smoothest beer to drink, which makes it one of my kind instantly. Something with a tasty kick that will put hair on your soddin chest. So it is not the aver beer drinking duster’s first choice. It is definitely not a beer for first time drinker’s either, unless that like strong coffee. It is a damn good beer, and will be a rebuy for this captain provided I can find it more often.

Rating: 5/5
~Ambrose E. Brightmore

Blonde Bitch

Alright this beer is a funny named brew from Moorhouse’s brewery. In fact it was bought mostly for the name. It is a citrus inspired blonde ale, with a tall old looking bottle that catches the eye of some drinkers that walk by. It lists itself as an award winning beer in simple vintage styled label that features a busty blonde farm girl holding wheat. In all honesty there was no other reason to buying this beer than its name which made me ruttin laugh my arse off. It is 4.99 a pint and is rather hard to find, only one store in the area carries it.

The beer pours rather flat, but has a nice smell. It is an opaque golden yellow that has very little bubble to it.
The flavor is initially tasty and has a sweet citrusy note. However, the after taste is that of a skunky beer. This may have been it was sitting on the self too ruttin long, which is often the case with singles that cost more than two dollars, or it could just be a bitter after taste that the beer has. However, it was still mostly enjoyable to ruttin drink. It is not a rebuy on this end. A lover of blondes may differ in ruttin opinion. It is worth one buy though, if for nothing else than the bad jokes that can be made about your name.
 
Rating: 2/5
 ~Ambrose E. Brightmore

Nola Blonde

First drinking this beer, and to be ruttin honest it I got it due to the fact it’s from a Louisiana brewery. This blonde as the title states is from the Nola Brewing Company out of New Orleans. I have tried other brews from the company out of the taps in the Crescent City, to be honest was not ruttin impressed.  It was decent beer but not my favorite, so I wrote the company off. Which was a bad ruttin idea.

Nola beers can be found across the state of Louisiana, but mostly in the city it is brewed in. The blonde comes in bright golden can with a dark red title block on the front, and the same on the back with a description of the beer. All in all the can is damn fancy, and should be what you drink it from. If you put it in a glass though, it is a nice golden color and makes a decent head. It does not have a strong aroma, and this weakness expands into its taste. This beer is bland. It claims five types of malt and two things of hops on its can, but lack a strong flavor like that would imply. It has a mild wheat flavor, which does not last long. It does not really have an after taste. It does have an enjoyable bitter note that changes into sweet. 

All in all it is an okay brew. Not ruttin great, but not soddin bad. If someone wants to get a slightly more expensive brew for a local themed grilling party, this is a not bad choice. Same on trying some new from the tap in a bar. However, this is not an everyday beer, or regular drinking beer. It would be good for a first timer since its tamer, but again lacks true flavor. 

~Ambrose E. Brightmore 

Rating: 2/5

Tin Roof Amber

Reviewing another local brew this time, and again it is from the Ten Roof Brewery in sodding Baton Rouge, Louisiana. This time it’s the amber. Now as I said this company is a damn good brewery. They brew three year round beers; Amber, Blonde and Bengal. While the Blonde was good, the Amber falls more into this captain’s ruttin tastes. 

The beer comes in a white and cream orange colored can, which you should ruttin drinking from the soddin can. Again the only reason this captain drank from a glass it to show you dusters the color of this beer. It pours well, and has a hoppy aroma that is good on a cold day. It produces a decent head, and has a deep amber color that just looks damn pretty.

The taste is the point of these reviews thou

gh. It has a rich hoppy somewhat soured bitter initial taste that is followed by a nice less bitter after note. It lingers in the mouth and makes you want to drink soddin more. It would go well with a strong cheese, or any kind of ruttin meet. It is really soddin good with a steak.

It is also affordable at around eight bucks a six pack, which comes with the company’s noticeable ecofriendly top cap six packs. It is also ruttin easy to find in most Louisiana stores. It is a definite rebuy, and good for first time drinkers.

~Ambrose E. Brightmore

Rating: 4/5

Abita Amber

Time for another ruttin Louisiana local brew. This time it is one of this captain’s favorites, Abita Amber. Abita is a brewery out of Abita, Louisiana that has been around since 1986. It has constantly produced damn good beers year after year. They keep it local and the brewery still offers free tours and beer as long as you have a designated driver. Ruttin greatness. Abita seems to have a keep it simple policy with its beer and produces good soddin brews. 

The Amber come in a standard Abita bottle. Its short and round, and easy to hold. It lacks pop with its damn label though. It’s a plain dark red label with gold labels. While label lacks any ruttin eye catching details, the beer does not need it. 

Abita Amber is a good true amber beer. It is a light reddish yellow, as it should be, and has a sweat aroma that will last for a few moments after opening the bottle.  It pours well and produces a decent foamy head, unless miss poured. It its ruttin missed poured a drinker will get nothing but a mouth full or foam. Not a good ruttin thing. So pour this damn beer slow into any kind of glass, or drink it out of the damn bottle, either way is good. The flavor is nice and smooth. It has a bitter note followed by a slightly sweat after tone. It is a great beer to just drink for itself or to drink on a hot arse day. Its flavor is a bit of a pick me up, and should always be served ice cold. It also goes well with strong cheeses or a grease burger. 

Abita is a great starter beer as well. It is heavier than a lot of beers, but not so heavy that it would turn a first time drinker off. It definitely is a rebuy and any money spent on this sod will go to a Louisiana business. So go out and get Abita Amber or any of the other damn beers they make.

~Ambrose E. Brightmore

Rating: 4/5

Southern Drawl

In honor of Craft Brew Week in my ruttin home town there will be a review everyday this week, and gunna soddin keep them local. 

 

Got a beer that is ruttin close to home for this review. Great Raft is newish, well to me it ruttin is, brewery out of Shreveport, Louisiana. It seems it was founded by a group of soddin smart dusters who know their way around a brew. They do not fail to surprise and create an enjoyable beer. They have a fairly large selection of beers, but for this review I am focusing on the Pale Lager called Southern Drawl. 

First thing about Great Raft beers are the cans, they are soddin pretty. They have a rustic look with fancy lettering, all the beers information, and what looks like colorized old ink prints. You will ruttin notice them. It is a busy design, but as you slowly enjoy this beer you will have time to read all of it. It reminds this captain of old sighs from store fronts. 

Southern Drawl is a light crisp golden yellow when you pour it from the can, and it makes a nice foamy head. It is damn pretty in a glass. It also has a mild aroma of wheat with a sweet after note. It flavor follows suit, it is a mild enjoyable beer. It has a sharp dry bitter and cold taste at the very beginning. I drank this at room temperature, and still felt it had a cold ruttin note. It also has a slightly sweet and dryer still after note. This beer goes well with anything salty, and I want to try this rut from a tap.

This is a great lighter beer for anyone to try, especially a first time drinker or a fan of pale brews. It is perfect for after doing some yard work, and I can tell this brew will be great on a summer day fresh from an ice box. Its name describes it perfectly. Open a can and sit back and slowly enjoy this brew. 

Rating: 4/5

~Ambrose E. Brightmore

Fraoch Heather Beer

This is an odd bit of brew that comes from Scotland. Fraoch brews a heather ale, which the brewery states has been brewed in Scotland for over 4000 thousand years. It comes in about the most Scottish looking bottle that is not scotch of William Wallace’s skull. It is a mix of dark green Celtic designs and shiny copper and gold additions. It will catch a ruttin A.D.D. drinker’s eye and the price is not bad for a single. I found it once or twice in a four pack at our local liquor store, but can’t soddin remember the price. 

The beer itself is a nice golden hue and easy to see through as water. I ruttin expected a cloudy beer for a Scottish Ale, but at only 5% alcohol it is not a soddin surprise it is easy to see through. The real point winner for this beer is its flavor. It is a flowery mix of sweet ant bitter. It has a floral note, not a soddin surprise with heather flowers in the beer, initially with the malt after shock. It is a damn tasty beer and drinks smooth. It has been a definite rebuy for this captain.

Rating: 5/5

~Ambrose E. Birghtmore